How do I find a good church?
Ever tried a new restaurant without reading reviews? Probably not. You check the menu, the ratings, maybe even photos of the food—because you want to know it’s worth your time and money. But when it comes to finding a church—something way more important than dinner—most people just pick the closest building with a cross on it and hope for the best. Today, we’re going to unpack why that’s a problem and how you can find a church that doesn’t just fill a Sunday slot, but actually helps you thrive in your walk with God.
Welcome back to Word for Word, where we’re diving deep into the questions that matter about Christianity, faith, and the Bible. Last week, in Episode 8, we tackled why Christians should attend church—we explored God's design for community, the irreplaceable benefits of gathering with other believers, and what we lose when we disconnect. But for many of you, that discussion may have raised another pressing question: "Okay, I get that I need to be part of a church - but how do I find a good one?" This is an incredibly important question, and one that deserves thoughtful consideration. After all, your church community will significantly shape your spiritual growth, your understanding of God, and even your relationships with others. And here’s the catch: not every church is the exact same, is it? Too many believers struggle to evaluate churches effectively, picking based on convenience or how cool worship band is, instead of what really matters. Today, we’re building on that foundation with practical, biblical guidance to help you find a good church—one that’s healthy, faithful, and life-giving. Because the reality is that not all churches are equally healthy. Some provide rich soil for spiritual growth, while others might actually hinder your walk with Christ. Finding a good church requires understanding biblical criteria and asking the right questions.
Our guide today comes from Acts 2:42, which gives us a beautiful picture of the early church:
“And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.”
This verse is like a snapshot of the early church—it’s not flashy, but it’s foundational. They prioritized four things:
sound teaching based on apostolic doctrine
genuine fellowship among believers
worship through communion ("breaking of bread")
a commitment to prayer
That’s our starting point. A good church isn’t about the size of the building or the coffee in the lobby—though I’m not knocking a good latte—it’s about these essential biblical elements coming together to help you know God and live out your faith. Whether you're relocating to a new city, feeling called to find a new church home, or perhaps exploring church for the first time, over the course of this article, it’s my goal to give you practical tools to make a wise, God-honoring decision. So let's dive in and explore how to find a church where you can truly thrive in your faith.
Essential Elements of a Healthy Church
When trying to find a good local church, it’s good to remember that, just like the people in them, no church is perfect. However, there are many important issues that should be considered when choosing a church. Some people live close to only a few churches, and their choices will be limited, but for others there are many more options. Be sure to pray about the churches you’re considering, to be sure you’re following the Lord’s leading as you search. I’d recommend to start your search online to see all of your options. Be especially sure to read a church’s doctrinal statement or statement of belief to find out about their stance on important issues. If from this initial research a church seems to be good and solid, visit the church (including small groups or Sunday schools classes) several weeks while prayerfully considering whether to join as a member. Listed below are some important things you should consider in your search to find a church.
What is being preached and taught?
Or, does the church have sound doctrine? Because this is non-negotiable. Paul told Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:16,
“Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.”
A good church teaches what the Bible actually says—not trendy opinions or watered-down feel-good stuff. So how do we do that - and what does "sound doctrine" actually mean? At its core, it means the church's teaching aligns with the essential truths of Christianity that we covered in Episode 3, "What is Essential Christian Doctrine?" This includes:
The authority and inerrancy of Scripture
The Trinity - one God in three persons
The full deity and humanity of Jesus Christ
Salvation by grace through faith alone
The necessity of Jesus's substitutionary death and physical resurrection
A healthy church doesn't shy away from these foundational truths but proclaims them clearly and consistently. Their teaching should be centered on the gospel - the good news that Jesus lived, died, and rose again to save sinners and reconcile them to God. And this doesn't mean every sermon needs to present the entire systematic theology of the church. But it does mean that over time, you should see a balanced diet of biblical teaching that consistently points to Christ and calls people to respond to His grace with faith and obedience.
Look for a church where sermons are:
Based on Scripture, not just the pastor's opinions
Focused on explaining what the Bible actually says (exegesis) rather than using verses to support predetermined points (eisegesis)
Both theological and practical, showing how biblical truth applies to daily life
Christ-centered, connecting every part of Scripture to God's redemptive plan through Jesus
As you evaluate a church's doctrine, don't just listen to one sermon. Look at their statement of faith on their website. Ask about the books or resources they recommend. Listen to how the leaders of the church talk about Jesus, sin, salvation, and the Bible. Over time, a pattern will emerge that reveals what they truly believe and value.
Biblical Leadership
The health of a church is intimately connected to the character and approach of its leaders. Scripture provides clear guidelines for church leadership in passages like 1 Timothy 3, Titus 1, and 1 Peter 5.
A healthy church will have leaders who:
Meet the Biblical Qualifications for Character and Conduct
This includes being "above reproach," faithful in marriage, self-controlled, not quarrelsome, not greedy, managing their own households well, and having a good reputation with outsiders.
Serve as Shepherds, Not CEOs
Jesus contrasted true shepherds with hired hands in John 10. The difference? Shepherds love and sacrifice for the sheep; hired hands prioritize themselves. Look for leaders who genuinely care for people, not just programs or attendance numbers.
Lead with Humility, Not Domination
Lead with humility, not domination. Peter instructs elders to "not lord it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock" (1 Peter 5:3). Healthy leaders don't demand authority; they earn respect through their Christ-like character and servant leadership.
Emphasize Accountability and Shared Responsibility
The New Testament consistently presents church leadership as plural (elders, not just one elder). This provides checks and balances against potential abuse of power.
Prioritize Equipping Others for Ministry
According to Ephesians 4:11-12, the role of church leaders is "to equip his people for works of service." Healthy leaders don't try to do everything themselves; they develop others and share ministry responsibilities.
So, when you are evaluating the leadership, pay attention not just to what leaders say, but how they interact with people, especially those who can't do anything for them or who disagree with them. Do they listen well? Do they apologize when wrong? Do they share power or hoard it? These are telling indicators of leadership health.
Genuine Community
The word "church" in the New Testament comes from the Greek ἐκκλησία (ekklesia), which means "assembly" or "gathering." The very definition of church implies community - people coming together around a shared faith in Christ. A healthy church fosters authentic relationships where people truly know and care for one another. This goes far beyond casual Sunday morning greetings. It includes real friendship, mutual support, accountability, and living out the many "one another" commands scattered throughout the New Testament - love one another, encourage one another, pray for one another, bear one another's burdens, and so on.
Signs of genuine community include:
Small group structures that allow for deeper relationships beyond Sunday services
People who know each other's names, stories, struggles, and joys
Practical care during life transitions or crises (meals, childcare, financial help, etc.)
Intergenerational connections, not just age-segregated ministries
Honest conversations about struggles, not just surface-level positivity
Celebration of life milestones and achievements together
Shared meals and social gatherings outside of official church events
One key indicator of community health is how the church handles conflict. All churches have disagreements - the question is how they're addressed. Do people speak directly to those they have issues with, following Matthew 18's pattern? Or does the church culture promote gossip, avoidance, or division? A healthy church doesn't pretend to be perfect but has pathways for reconciliation and healing when conflicts arise.
Worship and Sacraments
Authentic worship is another essential element of a healthy church. This isn't just about music style - although that's often what people focus on first. True worship encompasses our entire response to God's revelation of Himself.
In Acts 2:42, we see that "breaking of bread" - likely referring to both communion and shared meals - was central to early church gatherings. Throughout church history, the sacraments of baptism and communion have been key practices that unite believers and remind us of the gospel.
A healthy church will:
Prioritize God-centered, Christ-exalting worship rather than entertainment or emotional manipulation
Practice baptism and communion regularly and with proper explanation of their significance
Encourage participation, not just passive observation
Balance theological depth with accessibility for newcomers
Connect Sunday worship to daily living, showing how our whole lives are acts of worship
The style of worship (traditional, contemporary, liturgical, etc.) is less important than its substance. The central question is this: Does this church's worship help people encounter the true God as revealed in Scripture and respond appropriately to Him?
Missional Focus
Healthy churches don't exist for themselves. They understand that God's people are blessed to be a blessing (Genesis 12:2) and commissioned to make disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:19-20).
A missional church:
Regularly shares the gospel and invites response
Equips members to share their faith in daily life
Actively serves the surrounding community
Supports global missions through prayer, giving, and sending
Seeks the welfare of their city (Jeremiah 29:7), addressing both spiritual and physical needs
Welcomes those who are different culturally, economically, or generationally
You can often gauge a church's missional health by asking: If this church disappeared tomorrow, would the surrounding community notice or care? Has this church made a positive impact beyond its own members?
Biblical Discipleship
Finally, healthy churches take seriously Jesus's command to "make disciples" (Matthew 28:19), not just converts. Discipleship is the lifelong process of growing to become more like Christ in our character, conduct, and priorities.
Look for churches that:
Have clear pathways for spiritual growth beyond Sunday attendance
Offer Bible studies that teach people how to study Scripture for themselves
Encourage mentoring relationships between mature and newer believers
Address practical life issues through a biblical lens
Challenge members to grow, not just maintain spiritual comfort
Measure success by transformed lives, not just attendance or budgets
A good question to ask is: Does this church have a vision for what a mature disciple looks like and a plan to help people get there? Or is it content with keeping people as spiritual infants who depend entirely on church leaders for their spiritual nourishment?
Red Flags to Watch Out For
While looking for positive signs of a healthy church, it's equally important to be aware of warning signs that might indicate deeper problems. The following red flags don't necessarily mean you should immediately rule out a church, but they should prompt careful discernment and further investigation.
False Teaching
Perhaps the most serious red flag is teaching that contradicts or distorts essential Christian doctrines. The New Testament repeatedly warns about false teachers who lead people astray (2 Peter 2:1-3, Galatians 1:6-9, 1 Timothy 4:1-5).
Watch out for churches that:
Deny or minimize the authority of Scripture, treating the Bible as just one source of truth among many
Present Jesus as less than fully God and fully human
Teach that salvation comes through good works or religious rituals rather than by grace through faith
Promise health, wealth, or prosperity in exchange for faith or giving
Emphasize special revelation or new teachings that supposedly go beyond Scripture
Redefine sin to accommodate cultural trends rather than calling for biblical repentance
Sometimes false teaching is obvious, but often it's subtle - a slight shift in emphasis or a reinterpretation of key terms that gradually leads people away from biblical truth. This is why it's crucial to know Scripture well yourself, so you can recognize when something doesn't align with God's Word.
Toxic Leadership
Unhealthy leadership can poison an entire church culture. Jesus warned about religious leaders who "tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on people's shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to move them with their finger" (Matthew 23:4).
Red flags in leadership include:
Authoritarianism - demanding unquestioned obedience and shutting down legitimate questions
Lack of accountability - no systems for feedback or correction of leaders
Defensive responses to criticism rather than humble consideration
Pattern of disqualified leaders being quickly restored without evidence of repentance
Spiritual abuse - using Bible verses to control, shame, or manipulate
Cult of personality around the senior pastor or founding leader
Secrecy about finances, decision-making processes, or handling of problems
Pay special attention to how leaders treat those with less power or status. Do they show the same respect to the janitor as to wealthy donors? Do they listen to young people and women as carefully as to older men? Jesus's leadership was marked by serving the least, not catering to the greatest.
Manipulation Tactics
Healthy churches invite voluntary participation based on conviction, not coercion. Be wary of churches that use:
Fear-based motivation ("God will punish you if you don't...")
Guilt-driven appeals ("After all Jesus did for you, you should...")
Shame tactics for those who question or disagree
Excessive emotional manipulation during worship or giving times
Pressure to make quick decisions without time for prayer or consideration
"Insider" language or experiences that create an us-vs-them mentality
Testimonies that only highlight dramatic victories, creating unrealistic expectations
The Holy Spirit convicts of sin, but He doesn't manipulate or coerce. Churches that rely heavily on these tactics often reveal a lack of trust in God's work through gentler means.
Isolation Patterns
Unhealthy churches often gradually separate members from outside relationships and perspectives. This isolation makes it easier to control people and harder for them to recognize problematic patterns.
Warning signs include:
Encouraging members to limit contact with non-members, even family
Discouraging attendance at events hosted by other churches
Regularly criticizing other Christians or denominations
Claiming exclusive access to truth or special revelation
Requiring excessive time commitments that leave little room for other relationships
Monitoring members' social media or personal communications
Discouraging independent study of Scripture or theological resources
Healthy churches recognize they're part of the larger body of Christ. They may have distinct theological positions, but they acknowledge other faithful churches as legitimate expressions of God's people, not competitors or enemies.
Financial Impropriety
Money matters reveal much about a church's true priorities. Jesus talked more about money than almost any other topic because He knew it powerfully shapes our hearts.
Concerning patterns include:
Lack of financial transparency about how funds are used
Pressure tactics for giving, especially promises of financial blessing in return
Extravagant lifestyle of leaders funded by church money
Making people feel guilty for not giving more
Focusing more on building projects or amenities than on mission and ministry
No meaningful financial oversight or accountability systems
Regular "emergency" appeals for funds despite substantial income
While churches need financial resources to operate, how they handle money should reflect kingdom values of generosity, integrity, and wise stewardship.
Resistance to Questions
Perhaps the subtlest red flag is a culture that discourages honest questions or concerns. In healthy churches, leaders welcome thoughtful questions as opportunities for growth and clarification.
Be cautious of churches where:
Leaders become defensive or angry when questioned
Questions are dismissed with "Just have faith" or "Trust the leadership"
People who ask challenging questions are labeled as troublemakers
Theological discussions are shut down rather than engaged respectfully
Members seem afraid to express doubts or struggles
There's pressure to accept everything without examination
Critical thinking is discouraged as lacking faith
Jesus patiently answered questions throughout His ministry. The Bereans were commended for examining Paul's teaching against Scripture (Acts 17:11). A healthy church follows these examples, welcoming thoughtful engagement rather than demanding blind acceptance.
Practical Steps to Finding a Good Church
Now that we've covered what to look for (and what to avoid) in a church, let's talk about the practical process of finding one. This isn't just about checking off boxes on a list; it's about prayerfully seeking where God would have you serve and grow.
Research Phase
Before you ever visit a church in person, do some preliminary research:
Pray for guidance. Ask God to direct you to the right church community where you can both receive and contribute. This shouldn't be a one-time prayer but an ongoing conversation with God throughout your search.
Clarify your non-negotiables. Based on the essential elements we discussed earlier, identify what matters most to you in a church. This might include doctrinal positions, worship style, community emphasis, or ministry opportunities. Be honest about your preferences while distinguishing between biblical essentials and personal preferences.
Create an initial list. Use online church directories, recommendations from trusted friends, or simple internet searches to identify potential churches in your area. If you're moving to a new location, ask your current pastor if they have connections there.
Review church websites. Most churches have websites that provide insight into their beliefs, values, leadership structure, and ministries. Pay special attention to:
Statement of faith or doctrinal positions
Information about the leadership team
Recent sermons (many churches post audio or video recordings)
Ministry opportunities and small group structures
Church history and denominational affiliations
Mission or vision statements
Listen to sermons online. Many churches post their sermons online. Listen to several recent messages to get a feel for the teaching style and content. Is it biblically grounded? Christ-centered? Applicable to daily life?
Check social media presence. A church's social media can reveal their priorities and community culture. What do they celebrate? How do they interact with followers? What events do they promote?
Narrow your list. Based on your research, identify 3-5 churches that seem most aligned with your biblical non-negotiables and would be feasible for you to visit regularly.
Visit Process
Once you've identified potential churches, it's time to visit in person. Here's how to make these visits most productive:
Attend multiple times. Visit each church on your short list at least 2-3 times before making a judgment. One Sunday might be atypical or catch the church having an "off day." Multiple visits provide a more accurate picture.
Try different service times. If a church offers multiple services, try attending different ones. Sometimes the culture or demographic varies between early and late services or between weekend and midweek gatherings.
Participate fully. During your visit, participate as much as a visitor can. Sing during worship, follow along with Scripture readings, take notes during the sermon, fill out a connection card. This gives you a better sense of the experience than just observing.
Attend more than just Sunday worship. If possible, attend a small group, Bible study, or special event. These settings often reveal more about the church's culture than Sunday services alone.
Interact with regular members. Strike up conversations before or after the service. Ask how long they've been attending and what they appreciate about the church. Their responses can be very revealing.
Meet with church leadership. If you're seriously considering a church, schedule a meeting with a pastor or elder. Come prepared with questions about the church's beliefs, values, and ministries. Notice how they respond - are they open and thoughtful, or defensive and dismissive?
Trust your spiritual discernment. Pay attention to how you feel during and after your visits. Do you leave feeling encouraged, challenged, and closer to God? Or confused, manipulated, or drained? The Holy Spirit often guides through these internal responses.
Evaluation Criteria
As you visit churches, how do you evaluate what you're experiencing? Here are some practical questions to consider in different areas:
Teaching and Doctrine:
Is the Bible central to the teaching, or is Scripture used sparingly to support the speaker's ideas?
Does the teaching regularly point to Jesus and the gospel?
Is there a good balance between explanation of the text and practical application?
Do sermons challenge comfortable cultural assumptions or merely reinforce them?
Are difficult passages and topics addressed, or only popular themes?
Worship:
Does the content of songs and prayers align with biblical truth?
Is the focus on God and His character, not just our experience or feelings?
Are communion and baptism practiced and explained biblically?
Does worship invite participation rather than passive observation?
Is there evidence of thoughtful planning and preparation without rigidity?
Community:
Do people interact meaningfully before and after services, or rush in and out?
Are there clear pathways for newcomers to connect beyond Sunday attendance?
Is there diversity in the congregation (age, ethnicity, socioeconomic status)?
How are needs within the community addressed (illness, job loss, family crises)?
Are there opportunities for intergenerational relationships to form?
Leadership:
Do leaders demonstrate humility and servant-heartedness?
Is there a team approach to ministry or is everything centered on one person?
Are there clear systems of accountability for leaders?
How do leaders respond to questions or disagreements?
Is there transparency about decision-making processes and finances?
Mission and Outreach:
Does the church actively engage with its local community?
Is there regular teaching about evangelism and mission?
Are global missions supported through prayer, giving, and sending?
How does the church serve those in need beyond its own members?
Is there a balance between proclamation of the gospel and demonstration of God's love through service?
Discipleship:
Are there clear processes for helping believers grow spiritually?
Is Bible study emphasized and taught?
Are there mentoring relationships between mature and newer believers?
How are families equipped to disciple children and teens?
Are members encouraged and equipped to serve according to their gifts?
Questions to Ask
Beyond your own observations, here are some specific questions to ask church leaders or long-term members:
About Beliefs:
"How would you describe this church's approach to Scripture?"
"What do you believe about Jesus and salvation?"
"What doctrinal issues do you consider essential versus secondary?"
"How does your church approach cultural issues that conflict with traditional Christian teaching?"
"What books or resources have most influenced the church's theological perspective?"
About Community:
"How do people typically connect beyond Sunday services?"
"What might a new member's first year at this church look like?"
"How does the church care for members going through difficult times?"
"How are conflicts or disagreements typically handled?"
"What does church discipline look like here?"
About Leadership:
"What is the leadership structure of the church?"
"How are major decisions made?"
"What accountability systems exist for church leaders?"
"How does the church handle financial matters and budgeting?"
"What is the process for addressing concerns about leadership actions or decisions?"
About Mission:
"How is this church involved in the local community?"
"What is your approach to evangelism and outreach?"
"How do you support global missions?"
"How do you balance meeting physical and spiritual needs?"
"What partnerships does the church have with other organizations or churches?"
About History and Future:
"What significant changes has the church gone through in recent years?"
"What current challenges is the church facing?"
"What is the vision for the next 5-10 years?"
"Have there been any major conflicts or divisions in the past? How were they handled?"
"What does the church consider its greatest strengths and weaknesses?"
Remember, the goal of these questions isn't to find a perfect church (which doesn't exist), but to find a healthy church where you can grow spiritually and contribute meaningfully.
Integration Process
Once you've found a church that seems to be a good fit, what then? Joining a church isn't just about showing up on Sundays; it's about becoming an integrated part of the community. Here's how to navigate that process:
First Steps
Follow the church's connection process. Most churches have an established pathway for newcomers - perhaps a welcome class, membership process, or introduction to leaders. Even if you're experienced in church life, don't skip these steps. They provide important context for this specific community.
Learn the church's story and culture. Every church has its own history, values, and unwritten cultural norms. Take time to understand where this church has been, what shaped it, and what makes it unique.
Clarify expectations. Different churches have different expectations of members regarding attendance, giving, service, and participation. Make sure you understand what's expected so you can make an informed commitment.
Make yourself known. Fill out connection cards, wear a name tag if offered, introduce yourself to people sitting nearby. Don't wait for others to approach you; take initiative in building relationships.
Commit to a consistent schedule. Regular attendance is essential for building relationships and becoming part of community life. Try to attend the same service time consistently so you begin to see familiar faces.
Getting Involved
Join a small group. Whether called small groups, life groups, home groups, or something else, these smaller gatherings are where deeper relationships typically form. Look for a group that fits your life stage or interests.
Serve in a ministry. Find a place to contribute based on your gifts, skills, and availability. Starting with a simple, limited commitment (like greeting one Sunday a month) can be a great way to meet people and learn more about the church.
Attend church-wide events. Special gatherings like potlucks, retreats, service days, or holiday celebrations provide natural opportunities to build relationships beyond Sunday mornings.
Participate in a Bible study or class. These settings allow for deeper discussion and learning than typically happens in a worship service or casual conversation.
Consider formal membership. Many churches have a membership process that includes classes about the church's beliefs, values, and expectations. This formal commitment deepens your connection to the community.
Building Relationships
Be intentional about learning names. Make a deliberate effort to remember people's names and details about their lives. This communicates value and helps forge stronger connections.
Invite people into your life. Don't wait for invitations to come your way. Take initiative in hosting meals, suggesting coffee meetings, or organizing activities with others from the church.
Share your story. Be appropriately vulnerable about your own journey, struggles, and growth areas. Authenticity invites authentic connection in return.
Communicate changes and absences. When you'll be away for an extended period, let your small group or close church friends know. This demonstrates commitment to the relationships.
Be patient with the process. Deep community takes time to build. Don't expect to feel completely at home or have best friends within a few weeks. Give relationships time to develop naturally.
Overcoming Common Challenges
Even in a healthy church, you might face some challenges as you integrate:
Feelings of exclusion. Established communities can unintentionally seem cliquish to newcomers. Remember that breaking into existing relationships takes time and initiative. Don't take it personally if integration happens gradually.
Disillusionment when problems emerge. Every church has flaws and weaknesses that become apparent over time. When you discover these, remember that perfection isn't the standard for a good church - health is. Healthy churches acknowledge problems and address them biblically.
Resistance to different approaches. If you've come from another church tradition, some practices may seem strange or even concerning. Before jumping to conclusions, ask questions to understand the biblical reasoning behind different approaches.
Difficulty finding your place. You might try several ministries or groups before finding where you best fit. This exploratory process is normal and valuable, not a sign of failure or incompatibility.
Comparison with previous churches. It's natural to compare a new church with places you've been before, but constant comparisons can hinder your ability to fully engage. Focus on the present community's strengths rather than what you miss from the past.
Remember, becoming part of a church community is a two-way relationship. The church has responsibility to welcome and include you, but you also have responsibility to engage, serve, and invest in the community. Your presence and participation enrich the church just as the church enriches your life.
Application Points
Now let's get very practical about applying what we've discussed. Here are specific tools and actions for different situations:
For Church Seekers
If you're actively looking for a church, here are some concrete steps to take:
Create a Church Visit Checklist:
Print a simple evaluation form to bring on each visit
Include sections for observations about teaching, worship, community, etc.
Rate each aspect on a scale (e.g., 1-5) while memories are fresh
Note questions that arise during your visit
Record your overall impressions and any follow-up steps
Develop a Systematic Visit Plan:
Schedule visits to your top 3-5 churches
Plan to attend each at least 2-3 times
Include both weekend services and at least one other activity
Space visits to allow for reflection between experiences
Keep notes comparing each church's strengths and weaknesses
Prepare a Leadership Conversation Guide:
Draft 8-10 key questions based on your priorities
Arrange meetings with pastors or elders at promising churches
Take notes during these conversations
Follow up with thank-you emails that include any additional questions
Reflect on how leaders responded, not just what they said
Create a Decision Matrix:
List your biblical non-negotiables and personal preferences
Rate each church on these criteria based on your visits
Identify where you might need to adjust expectations
Consider practical factors like location, service times, and opportunities
Pray through your evaluations before making a final decision
Remember that finding a church isn't just about checking boxes. It's about discerning where God is calling you to serve and grow. The Holy Spirit often guides through peace in your spirit, resonance with the teaching, and connections with the people - factors that don't always fit neatly on an evaluation form.
For New Church Members
If you've recently joined a church, here are ways to strengthen your integration:
First 30 Days Plan:
Attend worship services each week
Complete any newcomer or membership classes
Join at least one small group or Bible study
Meet individually with a pastor or elder
Learn the church's history and vision
Read the church's statement of faith or doctrinal positions
First 90 Days Plan:
Begin serving in at least one ministry
Invite 2-3 families or individuals from church to your home
Accept invitations to church social events
Establish a regular giving pattern
Learn about the church's missions and outreach efforts
Build relationships with staff and volunteer leaders
First Year Goals:
Know 25+ people by name and basic life details
Be known well by at least 5-10 people
Understand the church's decision-making processes
Identify your primary areas for service and contribution
Develop rhythms of participation in church life
Begin inviting others to church events or services
Relationship Building Strategies:
Take initiative in conversations before and after services
Use a contact management system to remember details about people
Follow up on prayer requests and life events you hear about
Participate in church workdays, mission projects, or meal ministries
Join recreational activities or interest groups within the church
Volunteer for roles that connect you with different segments of the congregation
Again, these are suggestions to help you be intentional, not rigid requirements. Integration happens at different speeds for different personalities and life situations. The key is consistent engagement over time.
For Established Church Members
If you've been at your church for a while, consider how you can help others in their church search and integration:
Welcoming Newcomers:
Learn to identify visitors and approach them warmly
Prepare simple questions to initiate genuine conversation
Offer to sit with first-time visitors during the service
Introduce newcomers to others with similar interests or life stages
Follow up within a week of meeting someone new
Invite visitors to your small group or an upcoming church event
Mentoring Newer Members:
Volunteer to guide someone through the integration process
Meet for coffee or meals to build relationship and answer questions
Share your own journey of finding and joining the church
Help connect newer members to ministry opportunities
Introduce them to people they might not meet otherwise
Be available to explain church traditions or practices that might be unfamiliar
Creating Inclusive Community:
Regularly include new people in your social gatherings
Look for those standing alone before and after services
Be aware of insider language or references that might exclude newcomers
Consider starting a small group specifically for newer members
Host meals or events designed to build bridges between established and new members
Advocate for church systems that effectively connect newcomers
These actions don't require official roles or responsibilities. Any church member can take initiative in welcoming others and helping them find their place in the community.
Special Considerations
Denominational Differences
One factor that often complicates the church search process is the variety of denominations and theological traditions. While we've focused on universal marks of a healthy church, it's also helpful to understand some key denominational distinctions.
Different Christian traditions emphasize different aspects of biblical truth and practice. For instance:
Baptist churches typically emphasize believer's baptism by immersion, congregational governance, and individual Bible study.
Presbyterian churches focus on covenant theology, reformed doctrine, and elder governance.
Methodist churches often emphasize practical holiness, social justice, and Wesleyan theology.
Lutheran churches maintain liturgical worship, sacramental theology, and a distinction between law and gospel.
Charismatic/Pentecostal churches highlight the ongoing work of the Holy Spirit, spiritual gifts, and expressive worship.
Anglican/Episcopal churches value liturgical tradition, sacramental worship, and episcopal governance.
Non-denominational churches vary widely but often blend elements from multiple traditions while avoiding formal denominational structures.
When considering churches from different traditions, start by understanding their core theological commitments. Ask about:
Their view of Scripture's authority and interpretation
Their understanding of salvation and how it's received
Their approach to baptism and communion
Their perspective on spiritual gifts
Their governance structure and decision-making process
Remember that no tradition has a perfect understanding of all biblical truth. Each emphasizes certain aspects while potentially underemphasizing others. The question isn't which tradition is absolutely correct, but which provides a healthy framework for your spiritual growth based on sound biblical interpretation.
If you're exploring a denominational tradition different from your background, be patient with yourself as you learn new terms, practices, and emphases. Ask questions about things you don't understand rather than making assumptions. Consider reading books that explain the theological foundations of the tradition to better understand its approach.
Family Considerations
Finding a church becomes more complex when multiple family members' needs must be considered. Here are some principles to guide this process:
Prioritize solid teaching and community. While age-appropriate ministries for children and teens are important, they shouldn't outweigh the fundamental elements of a healthy church. Strong adult discipleship usually correlates with strong youth and children's ministries.
Evaluate children's and youth ministries carefully. Look for programs that partner with parents rather than replacing them, teach Scripture rather than just entertaining, and foster genuine relationships rather than just activities.
Consider the family as a whole. Sometimes different family members have different preferences or needs. While it's not always possible to find a perfect fit for everyone, look for a church where each family member can grow spiritually.
Discuss church experiences together. After visiting a church, talk with your spouse and children about their impressions. What did they enjoy? What questions do they have? What would they like to see in a church home?
Remember that children learn from your example. If you prioritize convenience or entertainment over biblical faithfulness in choosing a church, you're teaching your children to do the same. Model what matters most.
Special Life Circumstances
Certain life situations may create unique considerations in your church search:
Singles often find themselves in churches designed primarily for families. Look for churches that value singles as complete members of the body, not just potential spouses. Are there singles in leadership? Are there groups or ministries where singles can connect and serve?
Those with disabilities may need to consider physical accessibility, accommodations for hearing or visual impairments, or specialized ministries for developmental disabilities. Beyond physical access, look for churches that welcome and include people with disabilities in the full life of the congregation.
People in recovery from addiction or abuse might need specific support systems. While not every church has formal recovery ministries, healthy churches acknowledge brokenness and provide safe places for healing. Are people open about struggles? Is grace extended to those with messy stories?
Cross-cultural considerations affect those who are ethnic minorities in their communities. While a church doesn't need to perfectly match your cultural background, it should demonstrate cultural awareness and sensitivity. Does the leadership reflect diversity? Is there respect for different cultural expressions of faith?
Remember that finding the right church sometimes involves compromise. You might not find a perfect match for every preference or need, but look for a community where you can thrive spiritually despite imperfections.
Making the Decision
After researching, visiting, and evaluating potential churches, how do you actually make the decision? Here are some steps to help you move from exploration to commitment:
Prayer and Discernment
Set aside dedicated prayer time. Ask God specifically for clarity about where He wants you to serve and grow. Invite Him to override your preferences if they don't align with His direction.
Listen for the Holy Spirit's guidance. This might come through Scripture that speaks to your situation, counsel from wise believers, or an internal sense of peace about a particular church.
Review your non-negotiables. Return to the list of essential elements you identified earlier. How does each church measure up against these biblical criteria?
Consider your spiritual growth. In which church environment are you most likely to grow in Christ-likeness? Where will you be both challenged and supported?
Practical Decision Factors
While spiritual discernment is primary, practical factors also matter:
Location and accessibility. Be realistic about distance. A church that's too far away may limit your ability to fully participate in community life.
Service times and scheduling. Does the church's schedule work with your family's rhythm? Can you consistently attend worship services and community gatherings?
Opportunities to serve. Consider where your gifts and passions might best contribute to the church's mission. Is there room for you to meaningfully serve?
Family fit. If you have a family, how do they feel about the church? While you might not find perfect consensus, major resistance from a spouse or children deserves careful consideration.
Making the Commitment
Once you've decided on a church, commit to it wholeheartedly:
Follow through on membership. If the church has a formal membership process, complete it. This communicates your commitment to the community and opens doors for deeper involvement.
Invest in relationships. Be intentional about building connections within the church. This might feel awkward at first, but persistence pays off in meaningful community.
Find your ministry niche. Discover where your gifts, skills, and passions can contribute to the church's mission. Serving alongside others builds relationships and gives you purpose within the community.
Practice patience. Remember that becoming fully integrated into a church takes time. Don't give up too quickly if the first few months feel challenging.
Guard against a consumer mindset. Commit to staying through difficulties rather than church-hopping when problems emerge (as they inevitably will in any community). Ask not just what the church can offer you, but what you can offer the church.
When to Consider Moving On
While commitment is important, there are legitimate reasons to leave a church. Consider a change if:
False teaching emerges. If the church begins promoting doctrine that contradicts essential Christian truths, it's appropriate to address your concerns with leadership. If the issue persists, finding a church that faithfully teaches Scripture may be necessary.
Leadership becomes abusive or corrupt. Spiritual abuse, financial misconduct, or leadership that refuses accountability are legitimate reasons to seek a healthier church environment.
Significant personal life change. A major move, change in family situation, or shift in life stage might necessitate finding a church that better meets your current needs.
God clearly directs you elsewhere. Sometimes God calls people to serve in a different church context. This should come after prayer, counsel, and careful discernment, not just personal preference.
Remember, however, that discomfort, minor disagreements, or unmet expectations aren't typically good reasons to leave a church. Growth often happens through working through challenges within a committed community.
Conclusion
Finding a good church isn't about checking boxes on a perfect church checklist—it's about discovering a community where you can grow in Christ and contribute to God's kingdom work. While no church is perfect, healthy churches provide fertile soil for spiritual development.
As we've seen, Scripture gives us clear guidance on what matters most in church life: sound doctrine, biblical leadership, genuine community, authentic worship, missional focus, and intentional discipleship. These elements aren't optional add-ons; they're essential to God's design for His church.
The process of finding a church requires both spiritual discernment and practical investigation. Through prayer, research, thoughtful evaluation, and patient integration, you can discover a church family where you truly belong.
Remember that becoming part of a church isn't just about what you receive; it's about what you give. Your presence, gifts, and participation are needed by the body of Christ. When you find a healthy church, commit to it wholeheartedly, knowing that your investment in this community is an investment in God's eternal purpose.
Next week, we'll continue our exploration of Christian community by addressing a related question: "What distinguishes Christianity from other religions?" Until then, I encourage you to reflect on what you've learned today and take steps toward finding or deepening your connection to a healthy church.
For those of you who are already settled in a good church, consider how you might help others in their search. Who could you invite? Who might need help navigating the connection process? How could you make your church more welcoming to newcomers?
And for everyone watching, remember that while finding a good church is important, being a good church member is equally crucial. As the apostle Paul reminds us, we are "members of one body," each with a vital role to play in the health and growth of Christ's church.
Thank you for joining me today. May God guide you to the church community where you can thrive in your relationship with Him and others.
